I found an extremely cool website the other day, and so I thought I should spread the word.  I'm one of those anal-retentive people who likes to have my Christmas shopping done before December even starts -- and if I can't be done with the actual shopping, I at least want to have the gifts for everyone picked out.  And I have a reputation as a pretty awesome "gift-giver."  I hate giving someone close to me a gift certificate or something like that -- I would rather have my present to them show that I've been paying attention to them all this time and really understand the type of thing that makes them tick.

So...check this out.  www.perfectgiftguide.com.  You go to the website, pick the age, gender and relation of the "givee," and then pick the price range and holiday for the type of gift.  Then it launches you into a rather extensive checklist of all of that person's likes and dislikes.  When you're done, it gives you a really long list of possible gifts, along with handly links for purchasing them.

I didn't actually buy anything off the site, but I got one person an exact match from the list, and I got a really good idea from the site for another person.  Not bad, considering how much I've pared down my Christmas list this year.  :-)  Hell, if nothing else, it's kind of fun.

And when in doubt, you can always buy someone a book or three for the holidays and support your local independent bookseller!  Here's a really fun book I finished while recovering at home: Neurotica, by Sue Margolis.  It's kind of bizarre, and very fluffy reading, but it's great for those weekends when you don't really want something heavy.  It's a novel set in England where this woman, who's a tabloid journalist, needs to write an article on female infidelity.  Her assignment is to find 3 women who have cheated on their husbands -- and not for love, just for the sex -- and tell their stories.  Well, she's seriously dissatisfied with her own sex life, so she decides she's going to have all three experiences herself and then make up 3 women for her article.  It's a hugely funny book.  It's not great literature by any stretch of the imagination, but who cares?

Recently ABC aired an episode of 20/20 which was supposed to shed light on the tragic death of Matthew Shepard.  Matthew was a gay college student in Laramie, WY, who was the victim of a brutal hate crime.  He was lured from a bar, beaten, pistol-whipped, tied to a fence and left for dead in a rural area.  He was found 18 hours later by a passing bicyclist, who conctacted the authorities.  He laid in a coma in the hospital for 5 days before he died.

This episode of 20/20, however, contained several blatant falsehoods.  The show attempted to undermine the truth that the beating and subsequent murder was a hate crime, despite the fact that interviews with the murderers clearly showed the motive was due to Matthew's homosexuality.  To see all of the things that 20/20 "muddled up" during this episode, you can visit GLAAD's website.

This is very disturbing.  Hate crime legislation is something that a gay American cannot take for granted in this country, though it's desperately important.  Though I'd like to deny it, we still live in a time and place where it's not always safe for a gay person to walk down the street.  Matthew Shepard's brutal murder is a chilling reminder of this.

My suggestion to all of you reading this is to contact ABC's sponsors.  Email or call them and let them know that you will not be supporting their company as long as they are a sponsor of ABC.  Here are 20/20's sponsors:

Capital One
Email: webinfo@capitalone.com
Customer Relations 1-800-955-7070

S.C. Johnson (Oust Air freshener)
http://www.scjbrands.com/contact/" title="http://www.scjbrands.com/contact/" target="_blank"http://www.scjbrands.com/cont...
1.800.494.4855

Colgate-Palmolive
mailto:Allison_Klimerman@ colpal.com
1-800-468-6502

Pizza Hut
1-800-948-8488
http://www.pizzahut.com/contact/feedback_type .asp" title="http://www.pizzahut.com/contact/feedback_type .asp" target="_blank"http://www.pizzahut.com/conta...

Phillip Morris - pmusa.com
 1-800-343-0975
http://pmusa.com/contact_us/contact_us _by_email.asp?action=init" title="http://pmusa.com/contact_us/contact_us _by_email.asp?action=init" target="_blank"http://pmusa.com/contact_us/c...

Hanes
http://www.hanes.com/contactus.jsp" title="http://www.hanes.com/contactus.jsp" target="_blank"http://www.hanes.com/contactu...
1-800-994-4348)

Outback Steakhouse
http://www.outbacksteakhouse.com/contactus/contactus.asp?Category=CATEGORY19" title="http://www.outbacksteakhouse.com/contactus/contactus.asp?Category=CATEGORY19" target="_blank"http://www.outbacksteakhouse....
Stephanie Amberg at 813-282-1225

Oral B - a Gillette company
1-800-566-7252

http://gillette.custhelp.com/cgi-bin/gillette.cfg/php/enduser/ask.php" title="http://gillette.custhelp.com/cgi-bin/gillette.cfg/php/enduser/ask.php" target="_blank"http://gillette.custhelp.com/...

Burlington Coat Factory
http://www.coat.com/contact/webform1.shtml" title="http://www.coat.com/contact/webform1.shtml" target="_blank"http://www.coat.com/contact/w...

Pepperedge Farms - Campbells
http://www.pepperidgefarm.com/contact.asp" title="http://www.pepperidgefarm.com/contact.asp" target="_blank"http://www.pepperidgefarm.com...

Nexium _ Astra Zenica - purplepill.com
800-4-nexium

My hope is that if enough people write in to these companies, it will send a message that the lies and cover-ups regarding hate crimes will not be tolerated.  I hope you join me.

I'm not really going to put together my usual long entry today, but I did want to give everyone that's been following the drama the update on my health situation.

I feel marginally better today.  I'm still occasionally trickling blood (I certainly never thought I would have to wear a pad -- now I know what you ladies go through every month), but it's not nearly as constant.  I also still have hematuria, but the clots seem to be gone, which is a relief (they're not very comfortable to pass).  For that matter, the whole "sandpaper syndrome" I remarked on yesterday is slowly improving...it still hurts to pee, but that will hopefully soon be a thing of the past.  The pain of the stent is still pretty constant, but I wasn't really expecting that to ease quickly, and it's no worse than passing a kidney stone.  That is coming out on December 9th.

I did decide to make a brave excursion to the grocery store today (I was out of food), and it was so nice to leave the house.  I felt like such an old man :-) but by taking it slow everything went fine.  Tomorrow I'm going to have to go to the pharmacy, and if I'm feeling up to it, I might head to the bookstore.

Mostly, I just want to thank everyone who has been there with encouragment the last few weeks.  I've been sick and whiny and impossible to be around, and I know it, so thank you for putting up with me.  It's you, my friends, that have made being sick and in pain bearable, and I appreciate it more than you know.

I forgot to post about this a few minutes ago.  I'm curious to know what your reaction to this is...I was abolutely incredulous.

I was looking for a book to read yesterday and during my hunt I came across another book I picked up a while back at a garage sale.  It's Prevention's New Encyclopedia of Common Diseases, published in 1984.  I have lots of medical reference texts, and even though the information in this one is a bit outdated, I still figured I'd find it interesting.  So I bought it, then promply forgot about it.  Until now.

I was flipping through it, reading random entries, when I came across the entry for schizophrenia.  This is a portion of what this book had to say:

Around 25% of all people hospitalized in America are hospitalized for schizophrenia.  A hospital is where they belong.

I read this, then read it again, then read it a third time to make sure my eyes weren't playing tricks on me.  I mean, I could imagine finding something like this in a text from the 40s or something, but not 1984!  For one thing, I strongly doubt that 25% of hospitalizations are due to schizophrenia.  That may have been believeable if it qualified it by saying "25% of all mental-health related hospitalizations," but it didn't.  And the next sentence -- the nerve!!

So, yes, please post your comments regarding this.  I'd like to know if others are as appalled as I am.

So I had my surgery yesterday.  I'm stuck inside until Tuesday recovering.  Evidently it went well, but I feel really rotten right now.  I knew the stent would be uncomfortable, but I guess I had no idea just how bad it would be.  Basically, it feels like I'm continually passing a kidney stone -- which was just the sort of pain that having surgery was supposed to alleviate in the first place.  I'm hoping it will get better with time -- even the strongest pain pills aren't having much of an effect, and it's such a deep, nauseating pain.

After surgery I had the most incredible urge to pee, so they gave me a urinal so that I could try right there from my bed.  I tried several times with no luck.  They hooked up a fresh IV full of Ringer's and put in on full-force, and let run while they took my back to the regular recovery room.  Finally a nurse came in and walked me to the bathroom.  I was able to pee this time, and I wished I hadn't.  It was the most agonizing thing I've ever done.  For one thing, all that came out at first was blood and some really large clots.  Apparently my urethra was abraded quite badly during the procedure, because it felt like sandpaper.  Still does, in fact.  I absolutely dread going to the bathroom.

When I finally got home from the hospital, I had a pretty severe panic.  I was about to order a pizza (I needed food to go along with my analgesics, and I was not up to cooking).  I reached in my back pocket for my checkbook, and it wasn't there.  Nor was my wallet.  I just about had a stroke.  I called Deb (the receptionist from work who drove me to surgery) and left her a message in case they fell out in her car.  I called the hospital and talked with the nurse who discharged me in case I left them in my room -- I remembered taking them out of the bag with my clothing when I was getting dressed.  No luck.  I was really starting to panic.  I searched all of my pockets countless times, getting more and more frantic, and still couldn't find them.  Finally, I found them in my bathroom.  Since I have to sit down to pee now (standing hurts too much), they fell out of my pocket.  But I didn't notice because my house was dark.

Oh, yes.  That was the icing on the cake for this whole debacle.  Late Thursday night I blew a fuse.  One that (naturally) controlled the electricity for everything in my apartment except for two outlets in the kitchen.  None of the overhead lights work, and I only have one extension cord.  My apartment has 1 window aside from the door, and it's been extremely gloomy and wintery, so even at noon the visibility in my apartment was next to nothing.  The fuse box is in the basement, and I don't have access.  So I called the landlord, and (of course) he was out of town for Thanksgiving.  He didn't get back until about 6:00 tonight.  When I called him, he was very apologetic and rushed right over, but it still really sucked to walk around with a flashlight and to shower by candlelight.

Well, thankfully I now have my electricity back on and my wallet and checkbook have been found.  Now if I could just get the pain and nausea to subside, I would be set -- in fact, it's kind of nice to have a weekend to do nothing at all.  Hopefully I'll be feeling a bit better by Monday, though.  I would really like to go to the used book store for some fresh reading material and also to get some yarn to finish the scarf I started crocheting.  The blanket for my grandma is essentially finished, there're just a few finishing touches left.  Assuming I'm up for it, I plan on going to Minneapolis with Matt to do some Christmas shopping on the 4th, and then I can do my gift exchange with my family then since I'm not going to seem them on the holiday itself.

I have an excellent book recommendation for you -- it's a classic.  I think everyone, at some point in their lives, should read Watership Down, by Richard Adams.  It's an epic tale of a society of rabbits.  The rabbits' warren is about to be demolished by an encroaching human development, and a few brave rabbits band together to find a new home, braving the dangers of the wilderness.  It sounds a bit like one of Aesop's fables, but once you start reading it you realize just how deep its themes are: society, survival, prejudice, ethics.  It's truly a masterpiece.  Some people are a bit put off by it's length (it's almost 500 pages), and some people don't know quite what to make of the rabbit "language" that is used in the book (but there's a convenient glossary in the back), but I really don't think it's particularly difficult to read.  And this book would really make an excellent gift for a high school student (or the more advanced junior high student as well).  Don't be put off by that, either, though...it's just as thought provoking and amazing to adults.  Two thumbs up.

Mike gave me my birthday present today.  Granted, it is a very belated birthday present, and, granted, he said he's combining it with my Christmas present.  But once I opened it, all was forgiven.

He got me a DVD player.  I know, I know.  I'm some sort of dinosaur to have gone this long without owning one.  But, my god, I don't even have cable.  For as much as I watch TV, it really wasn't worth it to buy one.  But now that I have one I can make up for lost time.  :-)

And it wouldn't have been a complete present without a DVD of some sort to watch on my new DVD player, right?  Well, he picked out probably the coolest thing in the entire world.  I got the newly released 1st season Golden Girls box set!

Ok, so I'm a dork.  A big one.  But hear me out.  I remember growing up watching the Golden Girls and really liking that show.  But it wasn't until I moved away to college that I became a fanatic.  I was living in the dorm, in a single room, and I hadn't met many people yet.  There's only so much homework a guy could do before his brain would shut down, and I didn't have quite the aversion to TV at that time that I seem to have now.  It always amazed me how people in dorms could just knock on some random stranger's door and become instant friends...I don't know if I'm just fussy or not as superficial as that, but needless to say, I had some lonely nights during those first few months on my own.  Turns out that Lifetime was airing the Golden Girls twice a day for an hour each time every day.  I would watch that show and somehow it brought me back to some warm fuzzy childhood memory -- like comfort food for the brain.  So I became addicted.

Now, I wasn't lonely for that long, but my new friends quickly realized that although I was up for anything most of the time, I was routinely unavailable between 4 and 5, and again between 10 and 11.  I was a little embarrassed, but I couldn't keep my addiction secret for long.  Finally I gave my friends ultimatums -- if they wanted to see me while the Golden Girls were on, they had to watch with me.  Do you believe it, most of them took me up on it.  By the end of that first year, there were about 11 or 12 of us that would regularly pack ourselves into one dorm room or another religiously to watch four old ladies talk about sex and cheesecake.  I have vivid memories of big strapping jocks telling their friends, "I told you not to call when my show is on."  Who knew Dorothy, Blanche, Rose and Sophia could have such appeal?

So, now I know what I'm going to be doing Friday while I sit in a morphine haze, recovering from surgery.  It'll be just like old times.  Thanks, Mike -- for a fantastic birthday present.

I got a donation request in the mail today.  Now, I get a lot of these.  I'm sure they're all for fantastic causes, but they pretty much all end up in the trash.  I don't have the financial ability to donate to everyone who asks, no matter how good the cause.

But this one was a little different.  Not only am I sending them a check, I'm going to talk a bit about what a great organization it is. 

Anyone who has read my blog with any regularity knows that I'm a gay man.  I'm not the biggest activist in the world, and I'm not a big queen.  Really, I'd just like the opportunity to live my life with the same rights that straight people enjoy.  But the political climate in America being what it is, that's not really something that I can take for granted.  In many states, gay people can be fired from their jobs that they are otherwise supremely qualified for for no reason besides their sexuality (which, except in the instance of harrassment, should never enter into the workplace).  Gay people's relationships aren't legally recognized, no matter how long or durable that relationship may be.  We can't take things like health insurance, tax deductions, or adoption for granted.  My god...we could be with the same person for 50 years, know that person more intimately than anyone else does, but if they should become seriously ill, we aren't even considered next of kin.  That's scary.

What I like to call the "religious right" is very adept at using the media to get their point across.  Groups like the Family Research council publicly call our relationships "couterfeit marriage."  The Catholic church has publicly stated that same-sex parenting is bad for children.  (This is the same Catholic church, I might add, that has been working feverishly to cover up its mounting child abuse scandal.  And that's not bad for children?)  Shit.  Jimmy Swaggert even publicly threatened to kill a gay man -- and received applause from his audience for it!

That's where GLAAD steps in.  GLAAD is the Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation.  It's an organization dedicated to ensuring the people everywhere can learn the truth about the GLBT community through inclusive and accurate media portrayals.  It's an organization that counters the slander and hatred that I mentioned in the last paragraph -- just the tip of the iceberg.  If you're going to support any kind of charitable organization, I would strongly suggest this one.  During the last election, 11 states voted to amend their constitutions to limit the rights of their GLBT citizens.  I've said it before, but it bears repeating: not since the time of SLAVERY has a constitution been changed to limit the rights of one particular group of people.

I'd like to think that this shift against our community isn't due to a surge in prejudice.  In fact, my personaly experience has been the opposite -- never have I seen people more open-minded.  But we need to fight these right-wing extremist lies that would like the populace to believe we're a bunce of deviant, child-molesting perverts.  GLAAD is an organization that can help open the eyes and minds of the normal people that just don't realize how ostracized and beaten-down we really are.  If nothing else, check out their website (link is above)...it's extremely informative.  (Oh, and if you want to see the video clip of Jimmy Swaggart's threat, click here.  It occurs at approximately the 36 minute mark.)

And I've said it before.  If you happen to be one of those fundamentalist right-wing lunatics I denounce so frequently and feel compelled to comment, please restrain yourself.  I've heard everything you've got to say, and someone's probably said it better.  Besides, it's my blog, and if I want to promote the "gay agenda" (oops, I've admitted it -- do I have to give back my toaster oven?), it's my own business.  Stifle it.

I haven't done a book review in a while, but I've got a good one for you.  White Oleander, by Janet Finch.  It was on Oprah's book club -- I must admit, that woman has picked out some pretty fantastic books.  Astrid's mother Ingrid is a poet who is imprisoned for murder.  She's shunted around from foster home to foster home, and the book is her story of the lessons she learns, the meaning of "home," and how a person deals with finding love and security in such a fragmented, insecure world, never sure where she's going to end up next.  It's a masterpiece.  I understand it was made into a movie, and I haven't seen it, but from what I hear it can't hold a candle to the book.  Read it.  It's amazing.

Four more days to D-day (or should I say P-day?).  Wish me luck on the operating table everyone.  I'm gonna need it.

So, I'm having surgery again.  I got the results of my CT scan today.  I have two kidney stones lodged in my right ureter, and another stuck in my upper right kidney.  Since the lithotripsy obviously didn't do the trick, they're going to stick a scope up through my urethra, bladder and into my ureter to pull the stones out one at a time.  Fun, huh?  I'll probably have to have a stent (an artificial ureter) put in to drain my right kidney for about a week, which is, I understand, a very painful undertaking.  But, then, I'm not sure things can get much more painful that having two kidney stones lodged in one's ureter.  Oh, and the best part: I have to fast all day on Thanksgiving.

Sorry if I'm a little bitter, but I'm sick of hurting, sick of not sleeping, and I have no idea how I'm going to pay for all of this.  Sure, I've got insurance, but that's only going to cover some of the bill, and I'm about as close to poverty as one can get without actually collecting food stamps once a month.  This is going to be interesting.  I'd ask my parents for help, but I know better.

I told my supervisor that I was having surgery and you know what she said?  "Well, you'd better start looking for someone to cover your shift."  Intellectually, I know it's my job to cover my shift, even if I am having surgery, and I would have done that anyway, but after the hellish morning at the doctor's office I was just kind of hoping for a little support.  Instead, I find out I'm a burden.  Nice.

I'm going to quit.  I'm way too whiny for my own good here, and I hate getting like this.  Hopefully some good painkillers and a few hours of sleep will improve my outlook.  At any rate, it'll all be done soon...

So here I am.  I apologize for not posting in so long, but this last week has been the worst string of days I've had for just about as long as I can remember.  For those of you who know me (and for those faithful readers who've been following along from the beginning), you know I have kidney problems.  Well, the shit hit the fan this week.  Saturday night I had plans to go out.  I cancelled at the last minute because I had some rather bad pain in my back, and even though it was tolerable, I didn't want to take the chance of it getting worse while I was away from home.  The pain went away.  By the time I went to bed, I felt fine...just a little crabby since I missed a chance to go party.  Sunday morning I woke up with the most extreme, agonizing pain in the world.  Yep...I was passing a kidney stone.  Went to the ER, and lots of Demerol later, I went home, thinking, "OK, that took care of that."  Well, the Demerol wore off, and the pain came back.  I'm not going to bore all of you with a blow-by-blow account of my week, but I've been to the ER three times, I've tried 5 different oral opiates, I've thrown up probably 40 times, and I haven't slept the whole night since last Friday night.  I called (and called, and called) my urologist, the one who was supposed to have fixed all of this, and he called me a junkie (not in so many words, told me that he "wasn't comfortable" giving me anything for the pain, and told me to "suck it up."  Those were his exact words.  In the meantime, I've gotten really creative.  I've tried everything to get this stone to pass, and it won't come out.

Today I finally got in to see my regular doctor, Dr. Schmitt.  It was kind of embarrassing...she walked into the room, and all of the pain and the stress and the lack of sleep ganged up on me and I burst into tears.  Well, she gave me a prescription for yet another painkiller (so far, this one seems to be working) and sent me off for a CT scan.  She'll call me tomorrow.  I just don't know what else to do.

On a lighter note, I'm 14 rows away from finishing the blanket I'm crocheting for my grandma.  When my grandma moved in to the assisted living facility, it occurred to me that giving her a Christmas present was going to be even harder than normal, since she didn't have room for anything.  I wanted to make her something, but I don't know how to make anything.  :-)  A co-worker taught me how to crochet.  I've been working on this blanket for months, and now it's almost done.  I almost don't want to give it up.  I'm glad I'm getting it done in time, though.  In fact, there's enough time that I'll be able to toss off a few scarves with all of my surplus yarn.  Get this...I ordered my yarn online.  When it arrived, I opened the box -- and it was bubblewrapped.  How's that for a brilliant innovation?

I don't have energy for a book review today.  I'll make it up to you guys later in the week.

I read an interesting article in Psychology Today that discussed love and compatibility.  Basically, it said that it wasn't people's interests and personal characteristics that keeps them together or drives them apart, but their "sensation-seeking drive."  Essentially, those people that (for example) love to take risks and are always looking for something new and exciting to do are most likely to find love with people that have the same drive.  Similarly, people that prefer steadiness and a lack of change in their day-to-day lives should hook up.  Interesting theory...

There was another article in there that I found just absolutely bizarre.  It talked about people who set up amateur counseling stations and - with absolutely no training whatsoever - make a living as "therapists."  One, Lisa Levy, started an off-off-Broadway production called psychotherapy live where she calls up audience members for 13 minute "speed-therapy" sessions.  (Here's a review.)  There's another couple who sets up chairs and a sign reading "Talk to me" at various NYC bus stops and street corners.  They spend 8 to 14 hours daily talking to strangers about their problems.  And perhaps most bizarre, there's a couple in Milwaukee who have started doing the same thing -- but in bathrooms.  That's right.  They're bathroom attendants.  Evidently they have such a following that some people now skip right past the dance floor and head straight for the john.  My god!  Being begged to give your advice and counsel even though you have know formal training.  I think I may have missed my calling...

For a really excellent read -- and something a bit different -- I'm recommending Purple Hibiscus, by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie.  This is the story of a 15-year-old Nigerian girl and her family.  Her father, while very generous and pious to outsiders, is abusive and tyrannical at home.  He has converted to Christianity (while many people in that region hold on to their traditional beliefs) and anything her father considers a sin is punishable.  She's beaten down for much of her life until circumstances take her to an aunt's house in the country for a week away from home, when she realizes how oppressed she really is.  This is a truly amazing book, and it's a fantastic window into another culture.

Last week in one of my posts I mentioned a rather disgusting experience at a restaurant involving an almost raw burger.  I've had food poisoning twice and I figured that with the holidays coming up, it wouldn't be a bad idea to remind everyone to be cautious.

Here are some reminders.  First, when you are cooking chicken, pork, turkey eggs, or any ground meat, make certain these foods are completely cooked through before serving them.  The safest, most effective way of doing this is with a meat thermometer (except with eggs).  To use the thermometer, insert it into the thickest portion of the meat, making sure it is not touching any bone.  Meats must reach a certain temperature before you can be certain you are safe from bacteria.  To find the safe temperature level, use this chart.

When you are handling raw or partially cooked meat, you must remember to wash your hands, cutting board, counter, utensils, etc. before handling other food using hot, soapy water.

When you are defrosting meat, defrost it in the refrigerator.  Never defrost meat at room temperature.  Those "quick-thaw" trays that have been advertised on TV have also been found to be unsafe under certain conditions.  If you have to defrost something quickly, use the microwave, or a cold water bath.

One of the most common causes of foodborne illnesses is the improper storing of cooked foods.  Because bacteria are everywhere, even when something has been adequately cooked, leftovers must be refrigerated within two hours (from the time you stopped cooking, not from the time dinner ended) to a temperature of 40 degrees. 

While we can be careful in our own kitchens, we're coming up on the time of year when we visit friends and family for holiday dinners, participate in workplace pot-lucks, and receive gifts of food.  If you have even the slightest suspicion that someting hasn't been prepared or stored adequately, don't eat it.  Don't risk your health.

If you suspect that you or someone you know has food poisoning, go to the emergency room.  It's very true that many, if not most cases of food poisoning will simply run their courses, there are foodborne organisms that can kill.  This first link is some examples of organisms and the types of food in which they're typically found.  This link, while a bit technical, lists the symptoms and onset times for the different organisms.  Remember, too, that the first symptoms generally don't show up for at least several hours (and sometimes days) after ingestion.

If you are looking for more information on protecting yourself from foodborne illnesses, a good all-around website to look at is on the USDA's website.  You should check it out, especially since there are so many things that I didn't cover here.  Believe me, if you've ever had food poisoning, you understand the importance of food safety.

On to something lighter...

A really good love story (and this coming from someone with a strong gag reflex) is Common Sons, by Ronald Donaghe.  Two high school boys in a farming community in the mid-60s share a public kiss and have to deal with the horror and self-loathing of coming out to their families and friends; standing up for each other and their love.  It's a true story of courage in the face of hatred and adversity, and I think it's one that a lot of us could stand to read considering our current political climate.  Hmm...

Today didn't start out to be a bad day.  The weather was absolutely beautiful for one thing -- after days and days of barely 50-degree highs, we got up to 71, which is pretty nice for November in Minnesota.

I spent some of my birthday money today.  I've needed a new toaster for a very long time now, and I got a nice one.  It's going to give me enormous pleasure to toss my old one.  I also got a space heater for those cold Minnesota winters that I know are just around the corner (although it did seem silly buying it today when there were people out in shorts).  I'm a little ashamed of myself, though.  I did my shopping at Wal-Mart.  I'm pretty anti-Wal-Mart.  I've never had a good experience dealing with that store.  But a new one just opened up in our town and I figured it was easier going there than trying to find what I was looking for elsewhere.  So, I guess I'm a hypocrite.  :-)

I was surprised to find out that Matt bought a car.  A 2nd car.  He's not getting rid of his jeep.  He bought some sort of 1974 Chrysler from a farmer in Zumbrota -- it's enormous.  I wish you could see this thing.  And he had no good reason for getting it, other than liking it.  And he's been totally irresponsible about the whole thing, too.  He didn't shop around for a loan, he's not planning on shopping around for insurance, he took the guy's word for it that there're no major problems...  I gave him a good lecture this morning about the whole thing, which irritated him.  :-)  I have completely turned into my mother.  *sigh*  Truthfully, I think what bugs me the most is that I (without even one car) don't have the kind of money to just up and decide to drop a couple thousand on a purchase that is completely unnecessary, and even if I did, I would never do it.  It must be nice to have good credit.

I am a bit upset tonight.  I was really looking forward to going out and partying for the first time in a long time -- mostly to celebrate my birthday.  So what happens?  I passed a kidney stone.  Now I feel just fine.  But up until about an hour ago, I could hardly move much less have a good time.  If I believed in God or karma I'd wonder what I did in a past life to deserve this.  I'm 26 years old with the inner workings of a 96-year-old.

Speaking of God and karma, anyone who is interested in spirituality should definitely check out The Celestine Prophecy, by James Redfield.  The people I've met who've red this have either loved it or hated it...there's not really a lot of middle ground.  It's basically a parable about a man who's led to Peru to discover 9 "insights" or spiritual truths that are being suppressed by the government.  It talks about coincidences, our history, and the evolution of mankind.  Obviously the story behind the words is fiction, but the underlying theories (called "synchronicity") are believed by a lot of people.  (Personally, although I consider myself "comfortably agnostic" and am staying out of it altogether, I find the ideas put forth in this book easier to grasp as "truth" than, say, those from the Bible.)  At  any rate, it's a very interesting read and it's virtually guaranteed to make you think about the world a little differently.  Happy reading!

It was my birthday yesterday.  I had a very nice day off.  I slept in until about 11 a.m. -- I would have probably slept longer had my mom not called.  Talked to my mother for a good hour, and we didn't argue about anything, which was nice (although it's getting easier and easier).  I took a walk to Paperbacks & Pieces, my most favorite used bookstore and had a long chat with Shelly (the owner) about good books and the election travesty between customers.  She recommended a couple of good books that I ended up getting.  I always spend way too much in her store, but I figured I could chalk the trip up as a birthday present to myself.

Matt took me out for dinner yesterday evening to Jefferson's.  I think it's sad that that's the nicest restaurant we can come up with.  I ordered a buffalo burger -- all the juicy decadence of a hamburger with a fraction of the fat.  I got it, cut it in half (fortunately) and discovered it was essentially raw inside.  Now, I really don't know if buffalo meat has the same issues with contamination as beef, but even if it's not totally dangerous -- yech!!  And when I sent it back, the waitress acted like I was putting her out.  Odd that this happens right after I get done talking about Robin Cook's book Toxin and E. coli contamination, which can be deadly.

Well, after my re-cooked burger, I decided on dessert, since I haven't had dessert in like 2 weeks and (are you noticing a theme here?) it was my birthday.  I ordered this brownie-ice cream thing.  I figured I wuold get a brownie with a scoop of ice cream on the top.  She brought it out and I could hear my arteries harden in anticipation.  There were 4 brownies, 4 scoops of ice cream, hot fudge, what looked like an entire cow's worth of whipped cream and 5 cherries.  I wasn't sure whether to eat it or take a picture.  But I finished it.  :-)  Too bad now I get to eat calorie-free for the next 3 months to make up for it.

My mother sent me a very nice shirt and some $ for a toaster (mine is heaven-bound).  I opened the shirt and at first I thought it was suede -- very soft, but very leathery.  But I knew my mom would never buy anything that needs drycleaning.  Sure enough, I shook it open, and out pops a note that says "Yes, you can wash it."  She's scary sometimes.

If you are a friend of mine and you're reading this and you forgot to call me yesterday, you're fired.  That's all I have to say about that.  I'm not naming names, you ingrates know who you are.  :-)

Before I go, I've got to tell you about a fabulous book I just finished: The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time, by Mark Haddon.  It's set in modern-day England and told from the perspective of a 15-year-old autistic boy.  He discovers a murdered dog in a neighbor's yard and ends up on quite an adventure.  I don't really want to say any more than that...it would ruin the surprises.  But I can say that it's very funny and very poignant.  I loved it.

Well, tomorrow is the time for all good men and women to come to the aid of their country.  Don't forget to vote!  It is so important this election that everyone gets out and is heard.  Don't forget: some states allow you to register at the polls, so check with your County Auditor (or equivalent) to see if you can still vote even if you're not registered.  The County Auditor is also a good place to find out where to go vote if you're not sure of your polling site.  And there are several states that mandate time off from work to vote if you're unable to go to the polls outside of work.  There are no excuses.  Please vote tomorrow.

Friday was very exciting.  "Lolita Love" (the Goddess of Earthly Desire) made her debut.  Yes, I went out in drag for the first time ever.  And I took Lolita to work.  She was a hit.  Our office manager was very embarrased that he thought I was hot from across the room (before he figured out who I really was) and several women told me they were jealous of my legs.  Really a nice compliment, considering it was the only thing on me that was real.  And to top it all off, a strange guy wandering through our parking lot asked me for my number while I was out for a smoke.  I was facing the other direction at the time, so I turned around and told him in my most gravelly voice that I didn't think he'd know what to do with it.  :-)  The CFO told me I was pretty.  All in all, it was a lot of fun.  I'm never doing it again.  I have a blister the size of Kentucky on my toe from size 11-1/2 AAA shoes (who makes these things??), my nails kept popping off (even though the glue was evidently strong enough to glue 4 fingers and a leg to the toilet seat), and my tape kept coming unstuck.  I'm not going into detail on that one.  Being a chick is way too much work for me -- I'm glad to be back in pants.

My birthday is on Wednesday!  I have always loved my birthday.  It's the one day I can make everything all about me and not feel guilty about it. :-)  And I'm still getting away with telling people that I'm 19.  Granted, there's not a whole lot of people that believe me anymore, but...  (I'm sure if you do some creative math you can come up with 19 somehow.  At least for the next few years until I turn 20.)

My friend Sam just got back from Asia with some sort of serious parasite, which (in a roundabout way) reminded me of an excellent book everyone should read.  Toxin, by Robin Cook.  Robin Cook writes medical thrillers (which are like my "trash" books), but this one is a little different from his usual script.  A doctor's little girl contracts food poisoning and gets sick.  He is not able to help her, so in frustration, he infiltrates the meat-packing industry that is to blame to get evidence.  I was surprised to find some very luke-warm reviews on Amazon...I really enjoyed this book.  The truly terrifying thing is that, although this book is fictitious, this could really happen.  Deaths from E. coli O157:H7 do occur and are so preventable.  But that's another blog.